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Anonymous

I have to share the last 30 or so hours with you. As some might know I mentioned last week that I was contemplating creating a body double of my model for a project. The requirement was it needed to be fairly accurate of the true form. Well after getting no response for any suggestions on methods I opted for the duct tape method. Here is my experience.

Sunday
11:00 a.m. I drive to hardware store to purchase duck tape, purchase same. Once in car, decide to check how difficult this brand may be to pull from the roll.
11:10 a.m. Go back inside and purchase one of each brand in search of one that is sticky, but not too sticky. Decide "ACE" hardware brand is the one for me. Purchase 2 rolls. Since once opened, the others can not be returned, decide spouse is getting gift.
11:30 a.m. Dig through closet for items to put on model that can be destroyed. Take all items to basement.
12:00 Model arrives with 2 helpers for this body wrap thing. She gets changed into destroyable items. Did I mention this is to be a full body wrap? Start at feet.
12:45 Entire legs of model wrapped. I decide I need to hit the bathroom since I drank 2 cups of coffee waiting for model to arrive. Model mentions she drank "Big Gulp" on way to my house. Bathroom is up stairs.
1:00 After skootching/dragging model up stairs with the aid of 2 helpers we make it to the top of stairs. Did I mention we had both legs from toe to hips tightly wrapped?
1:05
Bathroom is 6' X 8' with bathtub. Decide best way to get model onto toilet is for me to climb into bathtub and get one helper up on counter on other side to ease model down to seat. Realize that there is no way to lower pants, find the surgical scissors and have her and assistant cut crotch of pantie hose and underware. Did I mention she can not bend her legs?
1:10 Lower model to seat of toilet, helper screams as she hits handle on sink, soaks foot and behind as that is where her feet are as she is kneeling on top of counter. Laughing so hard I wet myself, grateful I was standing in bath tub. Did I mention the coffee I drank?
1:45 Back in studio, clean and refreshed.
2:30 Models upper torso to neck and upper arms wrapped. Ahhhh finally done.
2:45 It is decided we will cut along shoulder line and down one side to hips to get wrap from upper body. Then decide to cut a verticle line of about 15 inches along back of each leg centered over knee area and try to slide legs off without crushing. 3:00 Decide it was a very bad thing to use panty hose as leg covering as sticky went through mesh and now have a very unhappy model who did not shave legs this morning. Decide best thing to do is split each leg straight down the back from hips to toe and hope for the best.
3:30 Finally done, and very grateful for that too.
4:00 Make notes on what not to do next time. Retire for evening and recount day for spouse when he arrives and wants to know why I am giving him 4 rolls of duck tape. He is much amused.

Monday
9:00 am. Head downstairs to reclaim victory over duct tape body double. Spend next 2 hours carefully lining up and taping now stretched edges of cut duct tape.
11:00 After much thought I decide that cat litter is too heavy for entire body. Shredded foam too light and compressible. Decide that "Perlite" may be what I need. Perlite is light weight soil additive.
11:20 At hadrware store discover perlite is on sale, much happiness. Buy 10 bags for $2.47 per bag. Just nod my head when clerk exclaims I must have a lot of soil to condition. Pick up fastfood and eat lunch in jubilation of getting something on sale. 12:00 Start pouring bags of perlite through neck opening on body.
12:10 Begin coughing and realize that I am breathing a lot of dust, decide to get face mask to protect health. Prop half filled body up and go in search.
12:15 Found mask, body fell over spilled perlite all over.
12:30 Pouring cleaned up perlite back into double and decide I probably do not have enough perlite to fill entire body. Beginning to strongly regret decision to do this project. Find 2 large bags of shredded foam in closet, decide to mix this in. Empty both bags and still have way too much to fill. At this point decide I do not really need the full legs, just the upper thigh. There is no way I am going to buy 10 more bags of perlite.
1:00 After great difficulty, I succeed in getting legs cut off and sealed. Poor contents of legs into neck. Decide foam and perlite should be intermixed.
1:15 Strange sensation when I pull my arm out of body. It feels as if it was slightly damp inside body. Hmmm... read bag of perlite. It conditions the soil by absorbing water. Realize this stuff is the same stuff I have hanging in a mesh bag from ceiling pipe to keep basement fresh smelling. Now hoping that next week the body double does not develop mildew smell from absorbed moisture.
2:00 Realize I have no way to hold body upright so it can be used. Decide to insert wooden hanger and suspend from ceiling.
2:00 Retaping cut neckline to get hanger inside body. And I am finally done!!!

I made some interesting discoveries with this project.

  1. Always, always mentally walk through a project you have never done before.
  2. Always, always double check if everyone has visited the bathroom before starting a project like this.
  3. 20 years ago I would have thrown the body double into the trash by 11:00 a.m. Monday morning. You do learn patience as you age.
  4. Now all I have to do is aquire wisdom.
  5. Discovered a new skill I had. When perlite spilled it fell over keyboard. Found out I could dismatle a keyboard, clean it up and it worked when put back together.
  6. Will never, ever attempt this again. Will purchase the largest fitting maniquin available and wrap it in foam if needed.